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Don’t ask why. Don’t ask the reasoning behind. Don’t ask to justify. You won’t get a real answer. All you’ll get is a personal defense of a position, with a heavy load of feelings. It’ll feel like an attack to the other one. Even when you have the best intentions. Start with “What” or “How” “What made you get to this decision / process / move…” “How did you come up to…” These 2 words take off the load of judgement over the question, and detach the person from the behavior. And with that, you’ll be one step closer to better understanding Why. |